April 1, 2014

Today’s Team: Team Of The Future
H/H Twilight Fiendling (Rake, Leap, Adrenal Glands)
P/S Lucky Quillen Cub (Comeback, Buried Treasure, Trample)
S/S Sapphire Cub (Pounce, Screech, Stone Rush)

I have been PvP pet battling a long time and rarely have I been able to come up with a team like this. I started with the Twilight Fiendling. I took Rake in the first slot to help protect myself against incoming attacks. The H/H doesn’t have much speed so I took Leap in the second slot. That leaves my Twilight Fiendling short of attack so Adrenal Glands will buff the critical chance of the other two moves. The second pet is more of an acknowledgement of Blizzard’s appreciation for me. The Lucky Quillen Cub helps me understand how important players who started WoW in Cataclysm are to them. Past Collector’s Editions have included mediocre pets such as the Netherwhelp, Frosty and Deathwing. Luckily, I started in Cataclysm so I am not burdened with those other pets but I reap all the benefits of the Lucky Quillen Cub from the MoP Collector’s Edition. Comeback is generally one of the best PvP moves so I must include that on the Lucky Quillen Cub. The other moves are not important if I have Comeback. Finally, I chose the Sapphire Cub to finish this team off. It’s all about speed. 390 speed, the fastest and most entirely necessary speed in the game. I took Screech in the second slot just in case any faster pets are introduced between the time I type this and when I start the battle. I don’t really need synergy or strategy since all of these pets are solid on their own.

I have none. This team should be able to handle Unborn Val’kyrs, Anubistah Idols and Death Adder Hatchlings easily.

The Opposing Team:
P/S Netherwhelp
P/P Son Of Animus
P/B Spawn Of G’Nathus

The Battle:
040114AI can’t help but feel a bit guilty when I bring my Lucky Quillen Cub to the battle and then have to face a Netherwhelp. All I can do is hope that my opponent also bought the MoP Collector’s Edition like me. I started with the Twilight Fiendling since it is the first pet on my list. My opponent started with the Spawn Of G’Nathus, which wasn’t the first pet on their list so I was already at an advantage. After getting Raked by my Twilight Fiendling my opponent swapped pets. Swapping pets, who does that? Don’t they know that you waste a turn that way? The Netherwhelp came in to face my Twilight Fiendling, who applied Adrenal Glands. Now that I had the superbuff my Twilight Fiendling had a 50% chance of getting a critical hit. I just spammed Leap to give me a speed advantage. Two of the Leaps crit for 337 and 333 damage. That’s about 220 extra damage thanks to Adrenal Glands! Under these circumstances how could the Netherwhelp hope to win this match-up? It didn’t.

040114CSon Of Animus replaced the Netherwhelp. My Twilight Feindling was already faster than Son Of Animus and wouldn’t survive a hit but I used Leap again anyways, just so my pet would be faster when it died. I brought in the Sapphire Cub against the Son Of Animus. Now instead of just being faster than the opposing pet, I’m way faster. I used a strong Stone Rush, which happened to crit for 1057 damage. Thank you rng, but it’s not like my team needs any help to dominate. After that my opponent swapped to back to the Spawn Of G’Nathus. There they go again. I didn’t want them to feel bad for wasting so many turns so I swapped to my Lucky Quillen Cub. Rake was still applied to the Spawn Of G’Nathus so its first attack was quite soft. I used Comeback but my opponent swapped again to the Son Of Animus. Extra Plating was still applied and the mechanical pet had less health than my Lucky Quillen Cub so Comeback only did 161 damage. I guess that’s one way to counter such a strong PvP move like Comeback. After some Tramples and another Comeback Son Of Animus was finished. The Spawn Of G’Nathus was the final pet my uber team had to face. Just when things were looking bleak I used Buried Treasure to get healed for a big 350 health. Good luck killing my pet now. The Spawn Of G’Nathus won the coin toss when both pets were in kill range, so at least if I lose I can blame rng and take absolutely no responsibility for the loss. Losing wasn’t in the cards, however, as all it took was one Stone Rush from my Sapphire Cub to end the battle. There really wasn’t much hope for my opponent, I mean what can you really do against a team like this.

9 Responses to April 1, 2014

  1. astra says:

    I laughed so hard it hurt. Thank you for this one, Disco!

  2. Attiana says:


  3. Rhonstifor says:

    Oh great. Now tonight I am going to see nothing but Fiendlings, Quillen Cubs and Sapphire Cubs. DAMN YOU DISCODOGGY AND YOUR OP TEAMS!

    ( that was hilarious….i lold )

  4. Ronninn says:

    I take it you can replace the lucky quillen cub with the perky pug right?

    • Discodoggy says:

      I’m glad you all enjoyed my version of an April Fool’s Day joke :)

      Perhaps on next April Fool’s Day the Perky Pug will make an appearance!

      The Chi-Chi team looks very tough to beat. When I feel like spanking someone I may give it a try.

      • Ronninn says:

        I fell for it hook like and sinker… I was about to farm an HH Twillight Fiendling to try it and level my Perky Pug, lol.

  5. Ronninn says:

    Oh, I’ve got a pretty killer team for you to try out :)

    Death Adder Hatchling (Poison Fang, Puncture Wounds, Blinding Poison)
    Lil’Ragnaros (Magma Wave, Magma Trap, Sons of Flame)
    Chi-chi (Fire Quills, Wild Magic, Feign Death)

    Most Fights I start with Either Chi-Chi to get up wild magic, then either Fire Quills or Feign Death, but this depends on enemy comps of course. Great versatile and lots of ways to avoid attacks with Feign Death, Blinding Poison, and Sons of Flame. Wild magic really works great with all the dots and multi hitting attacks. Will potentially save you if you hit an emperor crab. I hatted hitting those with my DAH, Lil’Rag and Valk combo, arghhh.

    • rhonstifor says:

      Yep, that is a killer team featuring 2 of the most in need of adjusting pets in the game. Your other team that exchanges valk for chi chi features 3 of the most in need of adjusting pets.

  6. Josh says:

    I didn’t fall for it as such as I knew it was such a poor team, but I have to say that your style of writing is usually so humble and unassuming that this tidal wave of sarcasm completely took me by surprise. As i’m behind on your blog and am only reading this today the April Fool’s thing went completely over my head!

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